A Good Eating Day

Today I am proud of myself. I was feeling sooo "snacky" all day. I wanted sweets. I wanted things like popcorn, chocolate, snickers, and I even thought about stopping by Olive Garden for some black tie mousse cake. I did not eat any of those things though. Instead, when I needed a snack I had a granola bar and peanut butter crackers. I have to admit, I did stop by Kroger on the way home and bought dove dark chocolates, popcorn and Starbucks mocha frapps. I did not partake, but the bad thing is now they are in my house. Shame on me!

Story of My Life

So obviously I have been MIA lately. I have been really busy, but I think that is just an excuse. Seriously, this is the story of my life, at least as far as my weight loss goes. I get really excited about doing something, whether it be a new diet, new gym, new workout video, or in this case a blog. The excitement then wears down and I go back down the same path. I refuse to do that this time. I'm going to make it a little easier on myself though, because I am really busy, and it is summer time and getting on the computer every night to blog is tough. I may or may not post every night, but I will keep posting and I will keep trying. I have decided to get rid of my FIAT post. It was just too hard to keep up with. I will talk about things I eat though.

The last 2 weeks have been crazy busy. We went out of town for a reunion, spent tons of time visiting various family members, and have been swimming a lot! I have eaten terribly too. It is so hard for me to eat well when I go out of town. No joke, I ate McDonald's 3 times last weekend. I had it again a couple days ago. I am seriously addicted to that place, and those fries!! I have rediscovered my love for drinking, but now instead of crown and coke, I've matured, and started downing wine. I am pretty positive wine has a lot of calories, especially when drank by the bottle. (Just a note: I actually hardly ever drink. I don't want anyone thinking I've turned into an alcoholic mommy.)

Tonight I am eating steak and grilled veggies. I also hate to admit that after losing 2 lbs, I gained them right back. I am not too happy about that, but I know in my heart I will and can do this.

FIAT

Breakfast:
bagel with cream cheese

Snack:
chocolate donut


Lunch:
tortilla chips and rotel
cookie


Dinner:
Rafferty's good ole boy cheese fries
chicken finger bite salad with ranch


Drinks:
64 oz water
20 oz coke
coffee


Today I was at work and we celebrated a co-worker's 50th birthday. One of my biggest weaknesses is office parties and snacks. Everyone's doing it, right? Oh and it looks soooo good. I'd really love it if I could start eating better soon.

Family Reunion Weekend

So this weekend was a blast. I went out of town to Rural Retreat, VA for a family reunion. It was little man's first stay in a hotel room. I will tell you that being in a hotel room with a 10 month old is a nightmare! Especially since my 10 month old likes to go go go and have lots of room to run around. This may have caused some stress induced eating habits, haha.

I will go ahead and say it. I ate terrible all weekend. I also drank. A LOT. I never get a chance to drink anymore so I did and we had a blast but man am I feeling it today. Exhausted is not even the right word. 6 plus hours in the car equals fast food stops, at least for us. I had McDonalds twice. Yep, and I feel icky. I had 2 and a half bottles of wine over the weekend. I had Pizza Hut pasta tonight because we were so tired and busy doing laundry and unpacking. I am afraid to step on the scale in the morning!

I will say I am very proud of myself for one good decision. At the reunion there were desserts that looked amazing! I did not partake, even after a little peer pressure. I am not sure why sometimes when you tell someone you are trying to be good why they would try to convince you to eat the dessert! I mean, it was like  this: "Mmmm this is the best banana pudding I have ever had. You sure you don't want a bite??? This cheesecake is amazing! Mmmmm sooo good!" Then they proceeded to hover their plate near me trying to tempt me. If the person that said this to me is reading this, I love you, but COME ON! I need encouragement, not that.

I realize I have missed a couple FIAT posts but that may happen here and there. I will try to update during the posts, like this one, when I do. I think I am going to get some much needed sleep now!!

FIAT

Breakfast:
bagel with cream cheese

Lunch:
Cracker barrel fried chicken salad with ranch dressing

Dinner:
Local restaurant 6oz filet
Mashed potatoes
House salad with ranch

Drinks:
64 oz water
Coffee
1 bottle of blackberry wine
20 oz of coke

I have been traveling today and went out to eat all day. I'm also drinking a lot!! I'm having a blast!

FIAT

Breakfast:
bagel with cream cheese

Snack:
banana
lunchable

Lunch:
Which Wich tuna sub with cheese, light mayo, and lettuce

Dinner:
Baked beans
2 hot dogs with ketchup, mustard, and cheese

I was at home today and went to the mall and got some walking in with my sister-in-law. I felt good about that, but my body hurts, even from just a little walking. It was so hot today too, so that ended up giving me a migraine.

FIAT

Breakfast:
Cinnamon and Raisin bagel with cream cheese

Snack:
Banana

Lunch:
Lunchable with wheat crackers, bologna and cheese
Mac n cheese (1 cup)

Snack:
Fruit bowl-had a couple strawberries, pieces of watermelon, and pineapple

Dinner: 3 pieces stuffed crust cheese pizza

Drinks:
64 oz water
16 oz coke

Phew, I'm glad the pizza is gone. No more temptation in the house. I was at home today with little man.

FIAT

Breakfast:
Peaches n Cream oatmeal

Snack:
Peanut Butter Crackers (6 pack)

Lunch:
Lean Cuisine Santa Fe Rice and Beans

Dinner:
2 pieces of left-over stuffed crust cheese pizza

Drinks:
64 oz water
8 oz grape juice
Starbucks grande mocha frap no whip cream

I worked today. I feel like today I did pretty good except for the pizza of course. Oh and the Starbucks!

Before Pics!

So, I am finally posting my before pics. I went and got my hair did today after work so I felt a little prettier. I am letting my hair grow out to it's natural color though so don't mind the terrible roots I have going on.

Here I am! I can not wait to post an after. I think I will post a new picture after every 10 lbs. What do you think? Ugh, my boobs are gigantic. I feel like they make my front look so much bigger than it is. If my boobs are this ridiculous after losing all the weight, I'm getting my boobs smaller. Fo sho.

My main insecurities are my arms, boobs, legs and double chins. I have some work to do!!

FIAT

Breakfast:
Peaches and Cream Quaker Oatmeal

Snack:
Chocolate Chip granola bar
about 20 reduced fat cheez-its

Lunch:
Smart Ones Angel Hair Marinara

Dinner:
3 pieces of stuffed crust cheese pizza from Pizza Hut

Drinks:
64 oz water
usual coffee
24 oz of coke

I was at work today. I ate pretty good...until I got home, of course. You saw my previous post...stupid Mondays!

Mondays...

...suck. They are hectic and busy and I end up coming home and not wanting to cook. I had plans of a pretty decent dinner. Pork chops, green beans, baked potato...but no. I came home and now guess what I'm having? Stuffed crust cheese pizza from Pizza Hut. Delicious yes, healthy no. I do this to myself all of the time. I know it is bad and I shouldn't but I keep doing it over and over again.

You would think after staring at my fat roll around my stomach while I sat outside and saw my reflection in the glass that I would want to eat salads all day. Why can't a salad taste like a double cheeseburger, damnit! I'll be back for the embarrassing FIAT later.

FIAT

Breakfast:
Peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread

Lunch:
Lunchable-balogna and cheese with crackers
Doritos

Dinner:
Half a box of Velveeta shells and cheese

Drinks:
My usual coffee
64 oz water
20 oz coke

I am at home by myself with little man today. That half a box of mac n cheese was good, but cost me 540 calories for the day. I need to eat better than that!

****Update****
I had a bologna and cheese sandwich with mayo on wheat bread 

I Have a 10 Month Old

Yep, I have a 10 month old and I am fat and out of shape. He seriously wears me out. He is so close to walking. I need to get in shape so that I can keep up with him! If you have read my other blog you know I have arthrogryposis. It makes things very difficult, but I adapt. Pregnancy really did a number on my body, and along with all of the extra weight gain, my body is totally in a funk. I have to take this joint medicine every night so that I don't get too stiff. I can tell if I miss a pill. Oh how I miss the days when I had so much energy and didn't hurt every day.

I ended up getting diagnosed with Post Partum Depression. It gradually got worse and worse so I finally talked to my doctor about it. I was super embarrassed and didn't even want to tell my husband. I got to a very bad point, and I had no energy, felt terrible about myself, didn't have any desire to do anything, felt useless, and was just very very depressed. My doctor put me on an antidepressant and it has made a huge difference. I feel much better, and really have started feeling myself again. I would never have had the courage to blog about this before. I know it was the right decision to go to the doctor though, because my depression was getting bad.

I knew I needed to be better for my sweet boy. It was a great decision, and I feel motivated now. I want to be healthier for him. I want to be active with him and be able to keep up with him. I have around 70 lbs to lose. I have no idea how to do it yet, because I have tried so many things. I figure this blog will help me find the right way and hold me accountable. Here's a picture of my sweet boy:

FIAT

Breakfast:
Quaker Strawberry Oatmeal
Hazelnut coffee with creamer and 2 splendas

Lunch:
Bologna and cheese sandwich on wheat bread with mayo

Snack:
Marble Slab double dark chocolate with chocolate chips in a small cup

Dinner:
Grilled barbecue chicken, squash and zucchini sautéed, grilled mushrooms and grilled potatoes, 3 slices of tomatoes and sliced cucumbers

Drinks:
20 oz coke
64 oz water

I was off today and went out and about so I was not so good with my eating. We also went to the in laws and had dinner there so that explains my delicious meal that was huge too!

Marble Slab

Why must you be so good?? Tell me, on 90 degree weather how do you refuse it?? That is my bad decision of the day. I'll post FIAT later. :)

Food I Ate Today

From here on out this post will be named "FIAT". I hope to update every day with EVERYTHING, as embarrassing as it may be, that I ate. Ugh I have a feeling this may be humiliating. I hope not for long though.

Morning:
Hazelnut Coffee with creamer and 2 packets of splenda
1 packet Quaker Oats Strawberry Oatmeal

Morning snack:
A LOT of reduced fat cheez-its
2 Dove dark chocolates

Lunch:
3 of my friends onion rings from restaurant
Lean Cuisine Sante Fe Rice and Beans
20 oz coke

Afternoon Snack:
More Cheez-Its
2 more Dove dark chocolates

Dinner:
2 pieces of Stuffed Crust Cheese Pizza
8 oz diet coke

I was at work today. I work a desk job and Fridays are slow so I tend to get bored and snack a lot. Until tomorrow...

The Reason

Hey! I have decided to do another blog, but this time about my journey to a healthier and happier me. I am not really sure the direction this blog will go yet, because I have no real plans as of yet on how I am going to get in shape. I know that I want to, and I have been trying for the past 6 years. No offense to my husband, but ever since we met, my weight has slowly gone up. My mom is a good cook, and his mom is a good cook. I have tried everything. I lost, I've gained, lost again, gained, had a baby, and now 10 months after having a baby I'm just too fat. I lost all my pregnancy weight but now I need to lose my "I got married and got fat" weight.

I plan on this being a VERY honest blog. I want to see where I go wrong. I pretty much know, but it will be helpful to look back, and who knows, maybe this can be helpful to someone else one day when I become a super hot momma! :)

I am currently 5'0 tall and 180 lbs. When I was 19, I felt my sexiest and healthiest. I was 106 lbs, and in great shape. I know I'm not 19, I'm 28 now, but my goal is to get to 110 lbs. I need to lose 70 lbs!! Holy geez. Here is a couple pictures of me at 19:

    

       

Yeah, I saw the Chippendales in Vegas...whew, hot show! Ok...I hate pictures of me now, but here is a current fat picture of me:

I can't find a full body one right now but I will add one later. You can see a big difference in my face and arms. ICK. I'm going to fix this. It might take me a few more falls (hopefully not) to get there, but I want it and need it. I plan on posting about my good choices and bad choices in food and exercise every week. If you have any suggestions on things I can do for the blog, please comment! I need all the help and motivation I can get!